If there is one thing that self-compassion has taught us, it is that it manifests in many forms. One of these forms is shopping. Did you know that when you are feeling overwhelmed or starved for attention, validation, or inclusion that your mind has a tendency to want to shop? Why not? With the right clothing, you can be anybody you want to be. You can dress to live in a fantasy that no longer needs the validation or acceptance of others, or you can dress so well that others cannot resist inviting you into their world.
So, when we begin to suffer, your truly intelligent and self-compassionate brain says, “Why don’t we do some shopping?” Of course, there is nothing wrong with this, especially if not taken to excess. Clothing can help you compensate for some suffering. However, it is more important (and cheaper) to see what our urge to shop is telling us than actually making several purchases. Our need to shop is telling us that we are suffering, and in need of some self-compassion. It is only when we are able to stop, and see what we truly need that we have the option to choose.
Easy Steps To Make Sure Shopping Gets You What You Really Want
The two most valuable things in the world are love, and the freedom to chose. I would also add the freedom to err. Life is a pretty difficult place, when you do not have permission to make mistakes. When the impulse to shop comes up, we first notice this impulse, and then ask ourselves what we really need. Then, we make a list of what we need (this is so we have several choices, and know what those choices are). Once we have the list, we can come up with an activity or activities that will help us yield the results we seek. Who knows, perhaps shopping will be amongst that list. This way we will know what we truly desire, and have a way to get it. Thank you shopping!
The Secret Of Shopping
As mentioned previously, we tend to engage in behaviors that are rewarding. If there is one thing that I know about figuring out what you really need, and then getting it, it is that it is truly rewarding. So, don’t settle for impulsive decisions that yield middle of the road results. Stop. Think about what you really want. Jot down a few options to get these things, and pick the one or two best that helps you get what you want with the least hassle. And, voila! You have unlocked the secret of shopping.
365 Days Of Self-Compassion. Day 173. In The Books.