Worried Your Child Might Be Depressed - Signs To Watch For and How to Help Them
Children — especially teens — can be as moody as anyone in the world. Depression, however, is more than those ups and downs. It can temporarily strip your life of meaning and joy. You lose interest in activities that once lit you up. Left unchecked, depression can push someone into thoughts of self-harm, death, and suicide. It can affect people of any age — including children.
Some three percent of children struggle with depression. More than three million U.S. adolescents between the ages of 12 and 17 have had one or more major depressive episodes. Therefore, it’s important that you can recognize signs and risk factors.
Risk Factors and Causes
The underlying causes of depression in children (depending on their age) include:
A family history of depression
Dealing with a physical illness, injury, or disability
Trauma and abuse
Family stress
Puberty-related hormonal changes
Substance abuse
General life stress (see below)
Anxiety
Since it can be challenging to diagnose anxiety in children, this is a common risk factor for them developing depression, too.
Life Events With The Potential to Trigger Childhood Depression
Relocation
Starting at a new school
Bullying
Parents are separated or divorced
Peer pressure
Academic stress and pressure
Problems with dating and relationships
If any of the above are present, there are some of the red flags to watch for.
Common Signs of Depression in Children
Age 12 and Younger
Losing interest in their favorite activities
Fear of failure and rejection
Erratic behavior at school (grades, attendance, and acting out)
Feeling hopeless and displaying low self-esteem
Unexpected bouts of sadness, tantrums, and crying
Choosing to self-isolate while showing difficulty with making friends
Inability to concentrate
Palpable increase in irritability
Low energy
Unexplained physical symptoms
Sleep disturbances
Noticeable changes in appetite and weight (either more or less)
A desire to run away from home
Worrying about death (their own and/or others in their life)
Talk of self-harm, dying, or suicide
Teens (13 to 18)
Any of the signs for younger children can linger into their years, e.g., somatic symptoms with no medical explanation, feeling worthless, and demonstrating a very volatile temper. In addition, your teen may:
Engage in risky behaviors like substance abuse, unsafe sex, criminality, and more
Be unable to make decisions — especially ones related to their future
Display inappropriate expressions of guilt
Become fixated on death and death-related topics
How to Help Your Depressed Child
Do Your Homework
A diagnosis of depression for your child is understandably jolting. But most people with depression recover, so you must resist the urge to panic. Read up and let the information guide you when interacting with your child and their medical team. Remain patient throughout the recovery process.
Never Blame Your Child
Depression is a disease. It’s no one’s fault, and your child cannot simply “be more positive.” Make certain your child knows you understand and they are not upsetting you by being sick. Whenever possible, come up with activities you can do together and use that time to causally talk about the situation. Encourage them to socialize without pressuring them.
Be Your Child’s Advocate
There will be medical appointments, therapy sessions, medication dosages, and so much more. Your child will need your strength and support.
Talk About Self-Harm and Suicide
Do not hide this potential aspect of their illness. They might already be trying to find a way to bring it up. Gently let them know you are always here to talk — no matter how tough the subject matter is.
First and foremost, help them get the professional help they need and deserve. You can be the bridge between struggling and thriving again.
Reach out if you are ready to help them with teen therapy.